Dating experts advise that finding a suitable companion can take a lot of effort and easily be as time consuming and involved as a career move, not to mention hard on your self esteem. Dating is a numbers game, the more potential spouses you meet, the better chance you have of finding a good one. Unfortunately too many people give up looking too quickly.
Dating Do’s
Do date a lot. Let yourself be casual about the process and meet as many potential partners as you can.
Do consider a personal card (like a business card) with your name, number and/or email address on it. They’re great for a quick introduction.
Do try different ways of meeting potential dates. If you have never met someone online or attended a dating club – try it out. Let yourself go into a bar to meet someone, give it a shot. You never know where that someone might be just waiting to find you.
Do let your friends and family know that you are looking.
Do look at your dates as potential friends. Ultimately a having a solid friendship is how you build anything long-term.
Do try to learn about the person you are dating. Find out their passions and interests. Make sure to focus on them as much as you share yourself.
Dating Don’ts
Don’t date a someone if they don’t turn you on physically. If he or she isn’t at least a 7 on your scale of 10, throw them back in the pool. No matter how good they look on paper you need to feel turned-on by them. Then again, don’t just date someone based on looks.
Don’t tell your date about other people you have loved, dated or screwed – at least not in the beginning. It’s not the place or time for your love history.
Don’t be late for a date.
Don’t go to bars alone looking for a date – you may get laid, but not likely loved.
Don’t try to be someone that you’re not or try to show off just to keep them interested.
Don’t call, email or text them daily, no matter how good it felt being together. Try to let the dating take its own course.
Don’t push to have sex quickly or let yourself be pushed. If it is the right person, there will be plenty of time for that. Let it stay hot between you for a while before bedding down.
Don’t talk about moving in, monogamy or bridal registries before at least 60 days of knowing each other – and even then only after first discussing this with a neutral friend.
And most meaningful of all, trust your feelings. Notice if you are being treated well and having fun. Notice if you feel respect for him or her and if you share similar values. If it isn’t working out, move on. Despite what all the songs tell us – there really are many people out there who could be THE ONE for each one of us. Good hunting.
